"SNAPSHOTS" Continued
* * * * * * * *
“Which one of you bums took the sports section? Oh, this isn’t it, is it? All right, could somebody tell me who won the track meet?”
“The mini-skirt is coming back next season. Look for-”
“-three fugitives who escaped after stealing-”
“-a cup of chopped onions, six-ounces of noodles, half a teaspoon of salt-”
“-and the track meet’s gonna be in Portland, Oregon and St. Louis, Missouri. I guess this must be it here.”
“Did you find the headline in there that says ‘berserk fireman kills buddies?”
~ ~ ~ ~
“John, you gotta show him you still care. Reassure him, for cryin’ out loud.”
“Cap. That dog is crazy. He fell asleep, let a cat walk right past him, then he gets jealous when we let it stick around for a while.”
“Well, you know how sensitive he is, Johnny.”
“Like my mother.” (only Chet....)
“Okay, Boot. Now, let me explain somethin’ to you. That cat in there needs us. Needs us all. She even needs you. Okay? Hmm? Okay. All right.”
“I don’t believe it.”
“Well, it’s just… psychology. I use it all the time on Chet.”
Alley Cat 10/06/73
* * * * * * * *
“Crazy Yanks.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Yeah, I know. Crazy Yanks.”
An English Visitor 10/13/73
* * * * * * * *
Look, Gage. A Mr. America you’re not. Now, I mean, you’ve got average build, with an average muscle tone, and like most Americans, you’re just a little soft and frail.”
“Soft?”
“Soft.”
“Huh-uh. No.”
“Gage, it’s nothing to be ashamed of-”
“-but, I-”
“You don’t have to apologize-”
“-you don’t....”
“I mean, none of us really have the time to keep in really good shape.”
“-but, you don’t understand. I’m NOT SOFT.”
“Do I… am I.... Do I look soft to you?”
“Well… only from the neck up.”
~ ~ ~ ~
““Well, listen, I’m skinny, but I’m tough.”
“So is Chet Kelly’s fried chicken.”
~ ~ ~ ~
"What's with the book, John?"
“Nothin’ that would interest you, Chet.”
“What is it? A pre-teen sex manual?”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Yeah, I know. Don’t get emotionally involved with a patient. Well, that kinda goes with the territory. For all of us.”
“Well, you don’t have to worry about me. There’s insulation built right inside this uniform.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Okay, but if you keep eating that kind of junk....”
“Junk? Chet, do you think this is a normal-type sandwich? Like some of that junk that you eat? Well, you’re wrong. As usual, you’re one-hundred per cent wrong. You know, Chet. I’m gonna tell you. This sandwich is made with… secret ingredients.”
“Secret ingredients? Come on, John”
“I’m not kidding you. I’m bein’ very serious with you. The recipe to this sandwich was given to me by an old Winnindago Indian. It was an ancient tribal secret, handed down from father to son. They used to eat this stuff all winter long, and they were in fantastic shape. Well, you know. You know how they used to outrun deer, and… run around in the snow half-naked. It was because of this stuff right here. And, they also lived to be fantastic old ages, too. Ah… Will you get out of there? In fact… in fact, the guy who gave me the recipe to this sandwich lived to be 114 years old himself, and he’d still be alive today if he wasn’t hit by a bus comin’ home from his girlfriend’s at three o’clock in the morning. You know, I’m gonna tell you something. Now, you’re not gonna believe this, but I had the hospital analyze the ingredients to this sandwich. You know what they told me? They said this could very well be a breakthrough in the care and feeding of the old people all over the world.”
“Hey! There’s a lot of money to be made in this sandwich!”
“I wonder if we have any more mayonnaise....”
Heavyweight 10/20/73
* * * * * * * *
“Big deal!”
“Oh, man. I’ve been bit by a rattler.”
“Engine 51 this is John. Uh… I just got bit by a rattlesnake.”
“John. Hang on, pal. Help’s on its way.”
“Damn it.”
“JOHNNY!”
“I don’t like it. If it’s a grade four, Johnny could be dead within minutes.”
“Okay, Captain. Let’s get me outta here.”
“LA, Engine 51 repeating. Patient is experiencing numbness around the mouth, also drowsiness.”
“That venom’s taking effect awfully fast. Some of it must’ve gotten in a vein. Time is a key factor now.”
“Twenty minutes.”
“I didn’t realize how fond he is of Johnny.”
“I don’t think Chet did either.”
“You know, I had a lousy feelin’ yesterday he wasn’t gonna make it.”
“What relationship? I just didn’t want to have to break in a new pigeon.”
“A little squeamish?”
“He’s all heart.”
Snakebite 10/27/73
* * * * * * * *
“Chester B?”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Seventy-fourth? I had to do better than that.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“That’s what it’s all about. Joanne and the kids.”
“Oh. Huh. Them too, huh?”
“Well, who else is there?”
“Me.”
“Where do you come in?”
“Well, I figure if I can get rid of you, maybe I might be able to get myself a decent partner.”
“Gee, I’m glad we had this heartwarming little talk.”
“Well, that’s okay. Anytime.”
“You’ve given me a whole fresh perspective.”
“Well, I’m glad I could help.”
“You didn’t.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Well, if we can break it, we can chew it.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“You know, when it got right up to leaving, I was sort of thinking of us as… male Florence Nightingales. It’s funny how your mind works. You know, you forget how many messy things, how many messy and miserable things we get into. I… I’m gonna take that promotion, I guess.”
“Well. Engineers have their bad days, too.”
~ ~ ~ ~
It’s gonna flash any second!”
~ ~ ~ ~
“You okay?”
“Ask me that same question in about an hour.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Well, I guess you expect me to tell you how grateful I am, and whatnot.”
“Whatever seems natural.”
“Well. I am. Grateful, I mean.”
“It gave me a chance to get my shoes dried out. By the way, I decided to… to pass up that promotion.”
“What for?”
"Well, I can always take another shot at it next year. Maybe by then the rules will be changed and you can still get a promotion and be a paramedic."
“Hmm. Well.... Worth another year, I guess.”
"Besides, you're gonna need somebody to look after you." ...... Yeah."
“Hey, next year for sure, though, huh?”
The Promotion 11/03/73
* * * * * * * *
“You okay?”
“Yeah. I’m just trying to get to sleep, that’s all.”
“With your eyes wide open?”
“Something new I’m trying.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Even ‘Terror at the Library’ didn’t do it for me.”
“No kiddin’? That was on? That’s one of my favorite flicks. If I’d known it was on, I would have stayed up and kept you company.”
“That might have put me to sleep.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“We didn’t get a run all… night… long.”
“That’s pretty lucky.”
“Yeah, that is… lucky… uh… right. Tha-that’s what I thought when I.... But, then I started thinkin’ about it, Roy. It’s not natural to not get a run in the middle of the night. And… and last night, the same thing happened again. We didn’t get a run. I was… I was waitin’ for the bell. The bell just… didn’t-.”
“-Look, we’re gonna be off duty when we get back to the station. Why dontcha go home and get some sleep.”
“I knew you wouldn’t understand.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Hi.”
"I knew you were gonna say that. (heavy sigh) I slept fine. For about an hour. Then I decided maybe I should store up in case I couldn't sleep tonight. Then, I couldn't sleep last night, thinkin' about that. Well. Really wasn't a full hour. I mean, I just figured I must've slept once in a while without realizing it."
“Hi, Johnny. Still got a little insomnia, huh?”
“It’s not insomnia, Chet.”
“Oh, my mistake. It’s just something with the same symptoms, huh?”
“Chet, lay off.”
“I’m sorry. I forgot how grumpy you get when you’re tired.”
“Chet, why don’t you go polish the engine?”
“Just tryin’ to help.”
“Oh, man. That’s all I need. For those clowns to get on me. This could be a very serious problem.”
“Look, take it easy. We’ve got all day to think of the solution.”
“That’s my problem.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Just get in, and it’ll rock you right to sleep.”
“Land of Nod, here he comes.”
“You guys are disgusting.”
“Don’t be a grouch. A lot of effort went into this project.”
“You know, Johnny, I was just thinkin’.”
“You too?”
“Well. No. So, okay, they rigged it up for a laugh. But, they may be onto something.”
“Onto what?”
“Well, there’s a real solid principle behind this.”
“Oh, no. You’re not gonna rock me to sleep in a cradle like a baby.”
“It doesn’t have to be a cradle. You can just…uh… think of it as a hammock.”
“A hammock?”
“Yeah, a hammock. There you are. On a hammock, layin’ on your back, under a nice, big tree on a lazy summer afternoon. And you’re just there. Rocking. Back… and forth. Baaack and forth. Now, what do you got to lose?”
“I’d rather be tired.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“I know I shouldn’t ask this, but, uh… what are you doin’?”
“Well, I’m makin’ cocoa.”
“Ah. So you can sleep like a little baby, right? Boy, you are really somethin’ else, you know that? I’ve watched you psyche yourself into an obsession all day about this thing. You couldn’t sleep right now if you had a skid full of barbiturates. You’re so convinced that until we get a night run, you’re gonna-”
Insomnia 11/10/73
* * * * * * * *
“All in a day’s work, Cap.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Hi guys. What’s happening?”
“Can you… give us a minute?”
“Sure, but you’ve injured my feelings.”
“Good.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“I don’t want to do anything fancy with my money. I just wanna spend it....”
~ ~ ~ ~
“A sail boat. Sounds awfully nice. Just you and the ocean out there. Alone.”
“Alone? Are you kidding me? Alone? I’m a rich man. I’m not going to go anyplace alone.”
“Yeah. I guess it’s just the way I took it. You know when I think of somebody gettin’ a boat, I just think of… bein’ out there by yourself with the tiller, ridin’ out into the sunset. Alone.”
“Yeah, well, I like the sunset as well as anybody, but I’m certainly not gonna go anyplace alone. I want a… want a coupla girls along.”
“A couple?”
“Well. I’m young enough.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Mr. Marshall? Um… exactly how much did the cat get?”
Inheritance Tax 11/17/73
* * * * * * * *
“If you don’t remember her, then why all the excitement?”
“Well, she’s a girl, isn’t she? She’s a girl.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Oh, it’s uh… I thought you… you know, there was someone… I was talk-… and… apparently… uh… he.... Excuse me, just for a second.”
Promise 12/01/73
* * * * * * * *
“Are you listening to me?”
“Huh?”
“What is with you today?”
“I don’t know. It’s… just that.... I don’t know. It’s dumb. It’s.... Man, I don’t wanna talk about it.”
“Why don’t you go ahead and tell me? You will anyway.”
“I don’t know, man. It’s… some days, they… they just don’t go right, they just… it’s incredible. It’s lack of communication, it’s… it’s misunderstanding, it’s confusion. It’s… it’s incredible, it’s the whole bag, it’s unbelievable, it’s… it’s -- all right, I’ve got it, will you just… leave me alone.”
“Well, if I’m following’ you, and I’m not really sure I am, the English translation is that, once again, a young lady has rejected you, right?”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Is it bigger than a bread box?”
“What?”
“Your recent problem.”
“Oh. One thing I can’t figure out is how I can say one thing and the person I’m talkin’ to hear another.”
“Well, in your case, it’s not all that difficult.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“No doubt in my mind, I’m all for weddings. As long as they’re not mine.”
“I like being married. Sometimes.”
“It’s a great convenience if you have kids.”
Body Language 12/08/73
* * * * * * * *
“I bet you don’t understand why I did that, do you? Well, the way I figure it, a bad deal is one thing-”
“You happy?”
“Huh?”
“You’re happy?”
“Happy? Sure, I’m....”
“Well, then don’t explain it to me. You see, I might start to understand you, and that would scare me.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“You mean, she just told you flat out ‘I don’t like you’?”
“Yeah. Inside of two minutes.”
“You were with her for a half an hour.”
“Yeah, I know. I wanted to stick around and find out what it was she didn’t like about me.”
“What are you? Some kind of masochist?”
“No. It’s the only way you can learn. Besides, I liked her.”
“You’re from another planet.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“You know, if you and I were robbin’ that bank in there, you know there’s… there’s a couple things you gotta get done before you do something like that. You really gotta plan something like that out. You know, we’ve gotta figure out the alarm systems, the placements of the guards. Gotta figure out how to get into the vault, maybe open a couple of safety deposit boxes along the way. We also got to figure out what to do with the staff. Also we gotta figure out the alarm systems. I mean, you don’t just walk into a bank with guns anymore. Guns are a bad deal, Roy. You know, you could accidentally shoot somebody and kill them, or they could keel over and have a heart attack, just like this guy almost did. Then, you’d be up for murder. That’s a life charge instead of say, twenty, thirty years for… for attempted robbery. Huh. Come to think of it, Roy, I don’t think robbin’ a bank is a good idea at all.”
Understanding 12/15/73
* * * * * * * *
“You know, only Gage could take a girl to dinner for $8.42. I mean, what can you feed a girl for $8.42? A hamburger and a coke?”
“Just a hamburger. Without cheese.”
“And a toothpick for desert, yeah?”
~ ~ ~ ~
“I told him to write a letter, but he never listens to me.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“I’m gonna go to the president of the company, if I have to.”
“Right. Tell ‘em Gloria sent you.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“… Said the bullet must have been pretty close to where your head was.”
“Lucky it wasn’t close to one of your vital zones.”
Computer Error 12/22/73
* * * * * * * *
"You know the trouble with you guys is that you just won't try anything new."
"Well, I'll tell you what's good with eggs.... is chili. Chili 'n eggs are good."
"Chili in the morning will rot your guts, Marco."
"Listen, I've had it all my life, and nothing's happened to me."
"That's what you think."
~ ~ ~ ~
"What makes this so good?"
"Sage."
"Sage?"
"What do you think took us so long? We were out in the desert, pickin' up tumbleweeds."
~ ~ ~ ~
"Anybody call the... uh, vending machine company?"
"Yes, I did. Nobody home."
"They must all be out rescuing idiots like me."
~ ~ ~ ~
"If I ask you a question, will you bite my head off?"
"Probably."
"Oh. O-okay."
~ ~ ~ ~
"Roy, nurses don't panic."
"They do when they get their hands caught in vending machines."
~ ~ ~ ~
"Man, it sure looks like to me like they're gonna need some more manpower."
"Yeah. Well. You'd better call the Chief Engineer and let him know."
~ ~ ~ ~
"I got so much dirt in there, I could grow dichondra."
~ ~ ~ ~
"Cap. Roy and John back from the hospital."
"You know, somethin'? I really thought we lost them out there today."
"Yeah. It was awful close."
~ ~ ~ ~
"That's funny. Didn't he know he had the best engine company in the County coming after him?"
"Well, he don't know you guys like we do."
"Unfortunately."
"Well, as long as you guys weren't worried."
"Oh, no way were we worried."
"Never even crossed our minds."
Inferno 01/05/74
* * * * * * * *
* * * * * * * *
“John, don’t you know the only thing more obvious than a Chet Kelly joke is your just having broken up with a girl?”
~ ~ ~ ~
“I think you’ve started something you’re gonna regret.”
“But, nobody escapes the Phantom.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Well, it do look like the Phantom got caught.”
Messing Around 01/12/74
* * * * * * * *
“What’s the matter with you two? Somebody steal your squad?”
~ ~ ~ ~
“How fast are you goin’anyway?”
“About thirty-five.”
“Oh. Guess it just seems faster on two wheels.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Yeah… You… you get a totally different perspective at four in the morning.”
Fools 01/19/74
* * * * * * * *
“Man, you never cease to amaze me.”
How Green Was My Thumb 01/26/74
* * * * * * * *
“Uh.... Sure.... I… um… I thought you were a little… you told me she was a little girl.”
The Hard Hours 02/02/74
* * * * * * * *
“Hey, I wouldn’t do that if I were you.”
“Yeah, well… you’re not me.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Yeah, but, I don’t think that we-”
“I know you don’t think. That’s why you’re so lucky to have me as a partner.”
The Floor Brigade 02/09/74
* * * * * * * *
“I like to lie in bed and read.”
“And eat.”
“Well, that relaxes me.”
“Relaxes you? Six times to the refrigerator, you went. Six times. Bang, clatter, clash. It was incredible.”
“I like somethin’ to nibble on.”
“Nibble on? Nibble on. For an hour and a half, you nibble? I don’t know how Joanne stands it.”
“Oh, she does it too.”
~ ~ ~ ~
The chips are five, ten and twenty.”
“Dollars?”
Propinquity (Kinship) 02/16/74
* * * * * * * *
“Hey, Gage! Is there somethin’ you can… uh… take for that, pal. Maybe some medicine?”
“Shut up.”
“He… he’s describing a foam bomb.”
“Hey, Gage. You gotta put a fire out, not blow it up.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Human fly shoes. That… that’s incredible, Chet.”
“Yep. Look, a man with these on could walk up any vertical flat surface. You know, it’s possible he might even… be able to walk upside down.”
“Have you tried that yet?”
“Well, not exactly, but I have tested the suction cups and don’t see any reason why they shouldn’t work.”
“Chet.”
“Yeah?”
“I don’t think that’s gonna work.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Ma’am, why don’t you stand over here out of the way. We don’t want something falling on your head.”
“Of course! That’s why you wear those helmets, isn’t it?”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Roy, I think we should just face it. Huh. Inventors we are not. Well, speaking of non-inventors....”
“You guys know that most of the great inventors died broke, or… or sometimes in jail?”
“Is that right?”
“Yeah. Kind of makes you wonder, doesn’t it?”
“Yeah?”
“I mean, I think every inventor has to ask himself one vital question.”
“What’s that?”
“Is the world ready for me?”
Inventions 03/23/74
* * * * * * * *
“The Thing That Ate The World.”
“He wrote that? That’s one of my favorite films.”
“Figures.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Next time, how about I give the shot?”
~ ~ ~ ~
“So, uh… have you ever been in a… a fire station before, Miss… uh…?”
“October. Renee. No. Actually, this is my first time. How about you?”
“What?”
“He comes here a lot. He’s the captain.”
“Ooh.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“… How many kids you got, Gage?”
“Kids? Oh, I don’t have any kids.”
“Oh, that’s too bad. Gotta have a family man. Someone the audience can identify with.”
“Oh. Well.” ..... “How soon you gonna shoot this film, Art?”
The Screenwriter 09/14/74
* * * * * * * *
“Don’t you say nothin’. You let me do the talkin’. Okay?
“Yes, ma’am.”
“You go get that ring, if you gotta cut off his finger.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Well. Actually, Dix, um… I kind of… uh… got in above… my head.”
“Well, it was my fault, too.”
“No, Chet, it was my fault.”
“Okay, it was your fault. So, what are you gonna do about it?”
“All right! If you’ve just got a box or something I can… dump this junk in and get it in my car, ’cause Tommy’s gonna be released tomorrow.”
“Sure, we have a box. That’s easy. We have a box? We have a box, don’t we? Well, now, you tell Tommy that this is all temporary. That… uh… we are gonna get this thing fixed back up.”
“Yeah. What else can you do to it?”
I’ll Fix It 09/21/74
* * * * * * * *
"Engine 17. Child stuck on an elephant. At the shopping center. Winnetka and Sepulveda. Winnetka and Sepulveda. Time out 09:35"
“All units with Engine 123, cancel. Battalion 9, Engine 123 reports this was an accidental fire alarm, activated by a Samoan fire dancer’s torch.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Yeah, well, it’s been a long time.”
“You were a star, right?”
“I was pretty good, but I wasn’t no star.”
“What was it they used to call you? You showed me that clipping, remember? John Gage, the Galloping Greyhound.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“I’ll tell you why. Because the 440 is the worst event in track. It’s like the hundred-yard dash, but only it’s four times as long. You’re pouring it on. It’s a killer.”
"So? Why don't you try out?"
“Hmm. You know why I went out for it.”
“A girl.”
“’Cause this girl. She dug athletes. Huh, you know… I knocked myself out for two solid years for her.”
“Well, for what it’s worth, you go out for this track meet, you even do halfway decent, you’ll be a hero to every guy in the department.”
“Yeah?”
“Well, sure.”
“Not quite the same thing.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“What was your time?”
“Well, wasn’t bad, actually.”
“Oh, that’s beautiful. What did I… what did I tell you?”
“Except. I practically destroyed the lower half of my anatomy, Roy. I mean, right now, I hurt all the way from my toenails all the way up to my b-” (the impeccable timing of those tones!)
~ ~ ~ ~
“You keep… buggin’ me about this Fireman Olympic thing. Why don’t you try out for it?”
“Well, that’s a different matter altogether.”
“Now, why is it a different matter altogether? You were on a team.”
“Swimming.”
“So? Why don’t you try out?”
“I was never a star like you. I was just one of the guys.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“The faster we’re in, the faster we’re out.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Let’s get the hell out of here!”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Where’s Johnny?”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Well, for a swimmer, you’re a pretty fast runner. You know that?”
“I just need the right incentive.”
“I tell you what. I’ll make you a deal. I’ll try out for the Olympics on one condition. That you do too.”
“Well, I guess that leaves us both out. They haven’t got my event.”
“What’s that?”
“A blind dash in a state of total panic.”
Gossip 09/28/74
* * * * * * * *
“Hey, did Hank Aaron hit any home runs yesterday?”
“I don’t know. Who’s he play for?”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Beautiful, isn’t she?”
“Yeah… yeah, she is. Guess I never will quit being nuts about these engines.”
“I know what you mean. It sorta gets in your blood.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Roy. You just have to have a system.”
“Nope. Can’t explain it. I… just get a feeling.”
“Well, what causes the feeling?”
“I don’t know.”
“Well, think.”
“I don’t wanna think. I just do it for enjoyment.”
“Pretty inconsiderate of you, if you ask me. The guys back at the station could be gettin’ rich if you just tell them how you do it.”
“I’m tellin’ you, I don’t know exactly how I do it.”
“All right. Okay. Fine. Fine. The least you could do is pick a horse so we could be on it.”
“I don’t want that responsibility. What if you lost”
“Roy, our friendship runs a heck of a lot deeper than… than just money.”
“Good. Now we can forget the whole idea.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Lookit there.”
“Oh, skateboards....”
“Here, hold on to this.”
“That’s not a good idea.”
“Oh, don’t worry about it. I’ve been on these things before. It’s just the thing of getting the knack of it, that’s all. It’s balance. Pure balance.”
“Whoa-whoa. Whoa-WHOA! ”
~ ~ ~ ~
“I was scared to death.”
“You weren’t alone.”
“Sounds like a close call.”
“A close call… are you kidding? I never wanna see another gun as long as I live. I’ll take landslides, fires, and-”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Well, you know, being there for real and betting is a lot tougher than I thought. Guess I just got carried away.”
“Roy. That sounds exactly… like something I’d do.”
“Or me.”
“Or me.”
“Or me.”
“Or me.”
"Don't worry about it." ..... "Pandora's Pride?"
Nagging Suspicion 10/05/74
* * * * * * * *
“Roy. Nobody knows anybody, no matter how much time they spend together.”
“Well, maybe you’re right. Look at you and me.”
“You know… Roy, uh… uh… I… I think that’s different. I mean, anybody that works as long and as close as you and I do, I-”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Hey, Roy. You nervous about bein’ on the tube tonight?
“Not really, Cap.”
“Captain, I coulda told you that.”
“Well, great Gage. Next time we wanna know Roy’s mother’s name, we’ll ask you.”
“Harriet.”
“Hmm?”
“Harriet. That’s Roy’s mother’s name.”
“Is that right, Roy?”
“Yeah.”
“Roy oughta take you on the show with him, instead of Joanne.”
“Oh, I’m sure Joanne knows him in some ways better than I do.”
“That’s a relief.”
“We know one another pretty well, don’t we, Roy? Come on, we know one another pretty well, don’t we?”
“Not enough to leave each other alone.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Harriet?”
“Yeah. They made it up. DeSoto’s mother’s name is ‘Mom’.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“You know, Roy. You say that you’re not… uh… nervous about this television quiz program. But… you’ve been… awfully quiet lately.”
“Oh, I’m just thinkin’ about what you were sayin’. You know, about two people not really being close to one another.”
“Yeah, you know, I was thinkin’ about the same thing. You know, I really think that you and I are really exceptions to the rule.”
“I talked to Joanne about it. We’re pretty close, but I… guess there are always emotional pockets where you hide from one another.”
“You know what with this… we don’t just… just work together, you know. I mean we socialize a lot together, too.”
“Yeah, what with this 24-hour shift and all, sometimes I don’t see Joanne for a day at a time, but I feel the rest of the time, we’re together just as much as most people, so I guess all-in-all, we’re about as close as two people can be.”
“Yeah, I agree.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“I’m drivin’.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“And now, Joanne, what do you think is Roy’s favorite vegetable?”
“Umm.... I know it’s between peas and carrots.”
“Uh…”
“Uh.... Peas. Peas, Joanne, peas.”
“Let’s see. Uhhhh.... I’ll say… mmmmmm… carrots.”
“Carrots? Oh, Joanne. She blew it. She blew it.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“I don’t believe it. I don’t believe it. Roy should have known that his favorite vegetables were peas.”
“Well, it just goes to show you, Gage. Nobody ever really knows anybody.”
Communication Gaffe 10/12/74
* * * * * * * *
“I guess we oughta forget about the dancing.”
“What dancing?”
“Oh, didn’t I mention that to you?”
“No, ‘cause I’d remember telling you what a crummy idea it was.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“What’s that bulge in your shirt there?”
“Oh, it’s cassettes. Don’t worry. I’m not even gonna mention dancing. Unless everybody seems to be in the mood.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“How’d it go?”
“Great. I think everybody that works at this hospital turned up at one time or another. Ate every speck of that food. Even got in a little dancing. Yeah. It’s too bad you missed it.”
“Yeah. Well. I don’t really like parties all that much anyway.”
“Yeah. Well, look, I gotta be goin’.”
“Wel-”
“Heads up. Surprise! Brought you some cake.
“Well, thanks.”
“I’m just down the hall.”
“That’s great.”
“How you feelin’, Johnny?”
“Well… uh.... much better now.”
“Johnny, in case you want to hear some good music.”
“Oh. Yeah. Well. Huh. Thanks.”
“Thanks for the-
“-thanks for the surprise.”
“-surprise.”
Surprise 10/19/74
* * * * * * * *
“You haven’t met Daisy.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“That’s Daisy?”
~ ~ ~ ~
“He just met Daisy.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Well, maybe he knows something that you don’t.”
“Yeah, well, maybe I know something he don’t.”
“Well, maybe neither one of you know anything.”
“Oh, why don’t you go get lost?”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Come into my parlor, said the nurse to the fireman.”
~ ~ ~ ~
“Boy, is she terrific. We have a date Saturday.”
“Well, the orphanage must… uh… need a swimming pool dug.”
“Well, I’m just having dinner with her at her place. She said she’s tired of large groups.”
“Marco. It’s a set up.”
“Either way, I’ll never tell.”
Daisy’s Pick 11/2/74
* * * * * * * *
* * * * * * * *
ON TO NEXT PART!
This is a terrific story so far isn't it?